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-Hi! -Hey!|-嗨 -嘿

So, what's the final head count on my baby shower?|有多少人会来参加 宝宝的欢迎会？

About twenty. Couple people from work had something else to do.|大约有20个人 有些同事有事没办法来

Your sisters called and can't make it.|你的妹妹们打电话来说她们没办法来

What? You mean they're not coming to a social event..|什么？ 你说她们不来参加…

where there's no men and no booze? That's shocking.|没有男人跟酒的社交聚会？ 那真的是太稀奇了

I don't care, as long as my mom's here.|我不在乎，只要我妈能来就行了

-Oh, my God. Your mother. -What? My mom's not gonna be here?|-天啊，你妈 -什么？我妈不会来吗？

Well, given that we forgot to invite her, it would be a big coincidence if she was.|说不定我们忘了邀请她 反而能让她松口气

My God!|我的天啊

Phoebe was in charge of the invitations.|不是我的错 菲比负责发请帖的

I don't have a mother. So often I forget..|我没有妈妈 所以我常忘了…

Oh, give it a rest.|得了吧

So my mother is not coming to my baby shower?|我妈妈不来参加 宝宝的欢迎会？

No.|对

Neither is mine.|我妈也不会来

We'll take care of it. We'll call her. You go home and get ready.|我们会处理的，我们会打电话给她 你先回家做准备

Make sure she comes. It's important. It's my mom.|确定她一定会来 这很重要，她是我妈

-I know. What's her number? -I don't know.|-我知道，她电话号码几号？ -我不知道

Go. I have it in my book. Go.|你去吧，我记在我的电话簿里了

If you're in charge of invitations, why am I calling her?|如果你负责寄请帖 为什么是我打电话给她？

Hello, Mrs. Green! Hi, it's Monica Geller.|喂，葛林太太 嗨，我是摩妮卡盖勒

-Oh, hello, Monica. -Hi.|-哈啰，摩妮卡 -嗨

It's last-minute, but we've decided to throw an impromptu..|这是紧急通知 我们打算在今天…

-baby shower for Rachel today. -My daughters told me..|-帮瑞秋的宝宝办欢迎会 -我的女儿们已经告诉我了…

when they received their impromptu invitations a month ago.|她们在一个月前 就接到欢迎会的请帖

-Okay, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. -For what, dear?|-好吧，我很抱歉 -为什么呢？亲爱的

For not inviting me, or for lying about it?|为了没有邀请我 还是你说谎骗我呢？

Oh, my God! My ass is sweating.|天啊，我的屁股在流汗

I'm sorry for everything. Really, I mean..|我为所有的事道歉 真的，我是说…

there's a lot of planning in a baby shower.|计划宝宝的欢迎会 真的累人

You know, things get overlooked and..|我们会忘了一些事 还有…

Phoebe's mother killed herself.|菲比的妈妈自杀了

Why? Did you forget to invite her too?|为什么？ 你们也忘了邀请她？

Oh, you're so funny.|你真是幽默

Please, please, can you come? It starts at 4:00.|拜托，你能来吗？ 欢迎会四点开始

-Well, all right. I'll see you at 4. -Thank you.|-好吧，四点见 -谢谢

-Isn't it at 3? -Son of a bitch!|-不是三点开始吗？ -混蛋

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Hey, Joe! Wanna shoot some hoops?|乔伊，你要去打篮球吗？

And for the record, I am not covering the tall one this time.|我得告诉你 这次我不要防守那个高个子

Fine, but she's not that tall.|好吧，但她没有那么高

I can't go. I'm practicing. I got an audition to be the host of a new game show.|我不能去，我在练习 我要参加新游戏节目主持人的试镜

-Cool! -Great!|-酷啊 -太棒了

If I get it, by day I'll be Dr. Drake Ramoray.|如果我能当上主持人 白天我是德瑞克拉莫瑞医生

But by night I'll be Joey Tribbiani!|但晚上我是乔伊崔比亚尼

You'll be perfect for this! That's already your name!|你非常适合这份工作 节目名称跟你的名字一样

I know. I know.|我知道

It'd be great if I got this because you never know what could happen on a soap.|我能够得到这份工作是最好的 因为谁都不知道演肥皂剧结果会怎么样

But I could be a game-show host forever.|但我可以一辈子 当游戏节目主持人

Like that Bob Barker guy. He's been doing The Price is Right for 75 years.|就像巴伯贝克 他主持猜价游戏75年

I bet the ratings weren't good for the first 25.|我敢说前25年的收视率 一定不太好

You know, before there was television.|那时根本没有电视机

But the problem, this game is really complicated.|问题是 这项游戏真的很复杂

Come on. You said the same thing about Hungry Hungry Hippos.|少来了 你也那么说饥饿河马

And last week, you beat Ben.|上星期你赢了班

Yeah. I have to be honest with you guys.|对 我得跟你们承认

He kind of let me win.|他有点放水让我赢

The audition's in a couple hours, and I don't understand the game.|再过几小时就要试镜 我搞不懂这个游戏

Do you want some help?|你需要帮忙吗？

Oh, really? That'd be great. Hey, you guys can be the contestants!|真的吗？那真的太棒了 你们可以当参赛者

We can lose to junior-high girls some other time.|我们可以下次 再去打败国中女生

All right. Let's play Bamboozled!|好吧，我们来玩晕头转向

-Bamboozled? -Yeah. Isn't that a cool name?|-晕头转向？ -对，那个名字很酷吧？

-Yeah! -No!|-对 -不

All right. Okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller.|好吧 第一位参赛者是罗斯盖勒

Tell us about yourself, Ross.|做个自我介绍吧，罗斯

Well, I'm a paleontologist. I live in New York.|我是古生物学家 我住在纽约

I have a son, Ben. Hi, Ben! And..|我有个儿子叫做班，嗨，班，还有…

I said, a little bit, Ross. How about you, Chandler?|我叫你介绍一下自己，罗斯 你呢？钱德

I'm a headhunter. I hook up out-of-work Soviet scientists..|我是个寻人专家 我在找为卑鄙的第三世界国家…

with rogue Third World nations. Hi, Rasputin.|失业的苏联科学家 嗨，拉斯普廷

Excellent! Let's play! Chandler, you'll go first.|太棒了，我们开始吧 钱德，你先

-What is the capital of Colombia? -Bogota.|-哥伦比亚的首都在哪里？ -波哥大

It's Bogota, but close enough.|是波格大，但很接近了

You can either pass your turn to Ross or pick a Wicked Wango Card.|可以把机会让给罗斯 或挑魔法机会牌

-What does a Wicked Wango Card do? -I should know that.|-魔法机会牌可以做什么？ -我早该知道的

Let's see. One moment, please..|让我看看，请等一下…

Here we are. A Wicked Wango Card determines if you go higher or lower.|好了，魔法机会牌 能决定你要向上或是向下

Higher or lower than what?|什么东西向上或是向下？

-This is embarrassing! -Can you believe how lame this is?|-这真的是太丢脸了 -你能相信这有多烂吗？

I'm sorry. I don't believe contestants are allowed to talk to each other.|抱歉 我想参赛者不该交谈

I told the stripper to be here at 5. That's good, right?|我叫脱衣舞男五点要到 那很棒吧？

You ordered a stripper for the shower? That is inappropriate.|你请脱衣舞男来宝宝欢迎会？ 那太不适当了

Why? He's gonna be dressed as a baby.|为什么？他会打扮成宝宝的样子

Oh, hi, Mrs. Green. I'm so glad you could make it.|嗨，葛林太太 我很高兴你赶来了

Thank you so much. We're so sorry. We could not feel worse about it.|谢谢你，我们很抱歉 我们真的很过意不去

Try.|试试看吧

There's my little girl!|我女儿在那边

-She's still mad. -Yeah, I know.|-她还在生气 -对，我知道

Isn't it great? One less person to make small talk with.|那不是很棒吗？ 少了一个人跟你咬耳朵

Hey, how are you?|你好吗？

Yeah, yeah. Okay, okay.|对，好吧

Phoebe, Sandra's mad at you too. It doesn't bother you?|菲比，珊卓拉也在生你的气 你不会感到困扰吗？

We've apologized twice. I can't do any more than that.|我们道了两次歉 我真的没办法了

You hate it when people are mad at you..|你讨厌 别人生你的气…

but you just have to be okay with it.|但你得去 接受它

Okay. I can do that.|好吧，我办得到

-I gotta go powder my ass. -Oh.|-我得去帮我的屁股扑痱子粉 -喔

Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school.|看看你的脸 你跟念高中时还是一样

If I didn't know better, I'd say you were a cheerleader in trouble.|要不是我很了解你 我会以为你是个有麻烦的啦啦队员

-Come, let's get some tea. -Okay.|-来吧，我们去喝点茶 -好吧

Oh, my! Look at that. Only three weeks to go.|天啊，你看 只剩三星期了

Did you pick a nanny? If you use your housekeeper, it will split her focus.|你挑好奶妈了吗？ 如果请管家兼职，她会分心的

Actually, I'm not gonna use a nanny. And I don't have a housekeeper.|事实上我不请奶妈 我也没有管家

It's like you're a cave person.|你好像山顶洞人

You must get a nanny. You don't know how overwhelming it will be.|你得请个奶妈 你不知道带孩子有多累

When you were a baby, I had Mrs. K.|你小时候我雇用了K太太

Mrs. K! Oh, yeah, she was sweet. She taught me Spanish.|K太太，对，她人真的很好 她教我西班牙文

I actually think I remember some of it.|我想 我还记得一点

Tu madre esta loca.|（西班牙文）

Such a sweet woman.|她真是个好人

And more important, she became a part of our family.|更重要的是 她成为我们家的一部份

That's right, Mrs. K. What did that K stand for?|没错，K太太 她到底姓什么？

I have no idea, dear. She was the nanny.|我不知道，亲爱的 她只是个奶妈

As great as she was, I can't afford that.|她真的很棒 我出不起那笔钱

I'm sorry. Sometimes I forget not everyone has alimony.|抱歉 有时我忘了不是大家都有赡养费

-Oh, Rachel! -What?|-瑞秋 -什么？

I just had a great idea! I'm gonna come live with you!|我想到一个好点子 我要搬过去跟你们住

What? What?|什么？

Oh, I'm so happy I'm gonna do this for my little girl.|我很高兴 我能帮我女儿这个忙

Look at you. You have tears in your eyes.|看看你 你感动的都快哭了

Yes, yes, I do.|没错，我是快哭了

Ross, you're in the lead.|罗斯，现在是你领先

Would you like to take another question or spin the Wheel of Mayhem?|你要再回答一题 或旋转处罚轮？

The Wheel has not been my friend tonight, Joey.|今天我转轮子的运气不太好 乔伊

I'll take another question.|我要再回答一题

Okay. This is gonna be tough. Hold your breath.|好吧，这题很难 仔细听好了

It's okay. I'm ready.|没关系，我准备好了

You gotta hold your breath until you answer.|你得注意听 再回答问题

This is ridiculous! He's not gonna hold his..|这太可笑了，他没办法注意…

Okay. What do you have a fear of if you suffer from this phobia? Triska..|好吧，如果你害怕恐惧的感觉 那该怎么说？惧…

Holy cow. That's a big word. Trisk..|天啊，那个字真长，惧…

Look at this. How do you say that?|看看这个，它该怎么念？

-Let me see that. -This one right here.|-让我看看 -就是这个字

-Triskaidekaphobia. -Fear of Triscuits!|-惧13症 -害怕树上

-No! No. Fear of the number 13. -Fear of Triscuits?|-不，是害怕13 -害怕树上？

It's possible. They have really sharp edges.|这有可能 它们真的都尖尖的

Chandler, you're up.|钱德，轮到你了

I'm entitled to use my Angel Pass for a free turn.|我要用天使通行证 换免费的机会

Yes, yes. But you can only use it once, so choose wisely.|对，但你只能使用一次 请考虑清楚

This is tricky.|这真的很难决定

I mean, I am in the lead, but I would love another shot at the Golden Monkey.|现在是我领先 但我想再试一次金猴

-This game makes no sense! -You're upset because you're losing.|-这个游戏真的很没有道理 -你很生气是因为你输了

Oh, come on, Ross. I think we're all losers here.|少来了，罗斯 我想我们都是失败者

I would like to hang on to my Angel Pass please.|我想用 我的天使通行证

You can either spin the Wheel or pick a Google Card.|你可以选轮子 或选张搜索牌

Let me think, let me think. Oh, I don't care.|让我想想 我不在乎

You must choose.|你非选不可

-Either. It makes no difference. -Choose, you jackass.|-那还是没有差别 -快选吧，混蛋

-I'll take a card. -You picked the Gimme Card!|-我要抽卡片 -你选到了给我卡

-You get all of Ross' points! -What?|-你拿到罗斯所有的分数 -什么？

This game is kind of fun!|这个游戏开始好玩起来了

You don't think it's crazy that you get my points..?|你不觉得你拿到我的分数 太疯狂了…

The contestants aren't supposed to speak to each other.|参赛者 不该交谈的

Now, do you wanna start opening presents..|你要开始 拆礼物了吗？

because it seems like people are getting itchy to leave.|因为大家 似乎急着想离开

And when I say people, I mean me.|我说大家 指的是我自己

-Why did you invite my mother? -What?|-你为什么要邀请我妈来？ -什么？

She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby.|她要搬过来跟我和罗斯住 以便帮忙照顾宝宝

-For how long? -Eight weeks.|-多久？ -八星期

I love my mother, but, my God, a long lunch with her is taxing.|我爱我妈，但是天啊 跟她一起吃午餐太久就是种折磨

I'd be honored if she wanted to live with me.|如果她想跟我住 我会觉得很光荣

She can't hear you.|她听不到

What am I gonna do?|我该怎么样？

If you don't want her to move in with you, just tell her.|如果不希望她搬过去 你该直说的

You're right. I'm about to have a baby.|你说的对 我就快生了

I can say I don't want her sleeping on my couch.|我可以说我不希望 她睡在沙发上

She'll wanna sleep in my bed. This can't happen.|她会睡在我床上 绝不能让那种事发生

That is right.|没错

Tell her you don't want her to live with you.|告诉她 你不希望她搬过去跟你们住

Do not take no for an answer.|别让她拒绝你

This is great! Now she's gonna be mad at Rachel!|这真的太棒了 现在她会生瑞秋的气

And I'm just gonna swoop in there and be like the daughter she never had.|我要跑过去 当她的乖女儿讨好她

Oh, honey, you have to let it go.|甜心 你得忘了这件事

Okay.|好吧

Who doesn't accept an apology?|谁不会接受道歉呢？

I mean, it's just so simple.|那真的很简单

"I'm sorry, Sandra." "That's okay, Monica.|“对不起，珊卓拉” “没关系，摩妮卡”

I forgive you.|我原谅你

And by the way, you're very pretty."|还有，你非常漂亮

I have new respect for Chandler.|我真的要很尊敬钱德了

All right, everybody! It's time to open the presents!|好了，大伙们 该来拆礼物了

Yes! The first gift that Rachel opens..|对 瑞秋要拆的第一样礼物…

should be from the grandmother.|应该是外婆送的礼物

Because you're the most important person in this room! And in the world!|因为你是这里最重要的人 也是全世界最重要的

I don't have a gift because I wasn't invited until the last minute.|我没有准备礼物 因为我在最后一分钟才被邀请

But thank you so much, dear, for bringing that to everybody's attention.|但非常谢谢你，亲爱的 让大家都注意到这一点

How about you less important people? Let's open your presents!|你们这些不重要的人呢？ 我们来拆你们的礼物吧

-It's okay that you didn't get a gift. -I kind of did.|-你没准备礼物也没关系 -但我也算是送了你一样礼物

Me! Eight weeks of me.|我要跟你同住八个星期

Okay. See, Mom, the truth is, I can do this on my own.|好吧，妈妈 事实上我可以自己照顾宝宝

I know you're gonna be a terrific mom.|我知道你会是个好妈妈

But you need help at the beginning.|但一开始你需要帮忙

I know what I'm doing. I can handle it.|我知道我在做什么 我应付得来

Really? Remember Twinkles?|真的吗？还记得亮亮吗？

He was a hamster. I'm not gonna vacuum up my baby!|他是只仓鼠 我不会拿吸尘器吸我的宝宝

Okay, come on, Rach. It's present time!|快来吧，瑞秋 拆礼物的时间到了

You're the glue holding this party together.|你是 这个派对的主角

It's kind of falling apart here.|现在这个派对也快毁了

-Oh, look! -Wow!|-你看 -哇

This is from your friends at work.|这是你同事送的

Oh, my gosh! Oh, wow! Oh, I know what this is.|天啊，哇 我知道这是什么

Wait a minute.|等一下

That can't be right.|不可能

Is that a beer bong for a baby?|这是宝宝的啤酒机吗？

Darling, that's a breast pump.|女儿，那是挤奶器

Did I say I was done guessing? Okay, thank you for that.|我说过我不再猜了吗？ 好吧，谢谢

Oh, wow! What's this?|哇，这是什么？

-It's a Diaper Genie. -It dispenses clean diapers!|-它是尿布精灵 -它是用来放干净尿布的

It's where you put dirty ones.|那是放脏尿布的

Why don't you take it outside and throw it in a dumpster?|我为什么不直接 把尿布丢在外面的垃圾桶？

-You're gonna do that 10 times a day? -What, it goes 10 times a day?|-你每天要丢十次吗？ -什么？宝宝一天可以拉十次？

Are we feeding this baby Indian food?|我们得喂她印度食物吗？

No, dear. That's what babies do.|不，宝宝都是那样的

Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.|瑞秋，听你妈妈的话 她非常聪明

What will you do with the baby while you trot out to the garbage?|你去倒垃圾桶时 宝宝要放在哪里？

I don't know, I'd leave it on the changing table?|我不知道 把她放在尿布台上？

-What? What did I do? What did I do? -You can't leave a baby alone.|-什么？我做了什么？ -你不能丢下宝宝一个人

Of course, I know that!|我当然知道

Of course you never leave a baby alone.|千万不能 丢下宝宝一个人

It would.. She wouldn't be safe.|它会… 她会不安全

Not as safe as she would be with me, the baby dummy.|她跟我这个菜鸟妈妈在一起 也不会安全

Opening the presents is a little overwhelming right now.|现在拆礼物 太刺激了

I'm gonna maybe open them all a little bit later.|我待会 会把它们都拆开

Thank you for coming, for the gifts..|谢谢你们赶来 还送了礼物…

-and this basket is beautiful. -It's actually a bassinet.|-这个篮子很漂亮 -它是摇篮

Okay, Mommy, don't ever leave me.|好吧，妈妈，别离开我

In what film would you hear this line: "We don't need no stinking badges!"|你会在哪电影听到这句台词？ “我们不需要臭警徽”

-Treasure of the Sierra Madre! -Correct! Backwards Bonus.|-《碧血金沙》 -答对了，倒念还能加分

-Madre Sierra the of Treasure! -Yes!|-沙金血碧 -对

What? There's extra points for that?|什么？那样子可以加分？

Fair not that's!|平公不

I'd like to go up the Ladder of Chance to the Golden Mud Hut!|我要爬上机会梯 到金泥屋去

-Wise choice. How many rungs? -Six!|-聪明的选择，几阶？ -六阶

-That noise can only mean one thing. -Hungry Monkey!|-那个声音只代表一个意思 -饥饿的猴子

-I'd like a Wicked Wango Card. -It's an audio question.|-我要魔法机会牌 -这是声音题

Name this television theme song:|说出这出电视剧的主题曲

Oh, my God. I know this. Give me a second.|天啊，我知道 让我想一想

-Tell it to the Time Turtle! -Shut up!|-去跟时间乌龟说吧 -闭嘴

-"I Dream of Jeannie"! -Yes! Back in the lead!|-《太空仙女恋》 -答对了，你再度领先

I'd like to spin the Wheel.|我要转轮子

Oh, come on!|快点

Super Speedy Speed Round.|超级快速回合

-Is there a Hopping Bonus? -Of course.|-跳跃有加分吗？ -当然

-Who invented bifocals? -Ben Franklin!|-谁发明了双焦点透镜？ -班法兰克林

Correct. Which monarch ruled Great Britain the longest?|答对了 哪个君王统治英国最久？

Queen Victoria!|维多莉亚女王

You forgot to switch legs between questions. No Hopping Bonus!|你忘了换题时要换腿跳 跳跃动作没加分

Every time!|每次都这样

-Yeah. Now over to Chandler. -I'd like a Google Card.|-对，现在轮到钱德了 -我要搜索卡

-Are you sure? -Yes! No! Google!|-你确定？ -对，不，搜索卡

Oh, my God! Congratulations, Ross! Because, Chandler..|天啊，恭喜你，罗斯 因为钱德…

-you've been Bamboozled! -No!|-你已经出局了 -不

-Yes! -This is the best game ever!|-对 -这是我玩过最棒的游戏

You'll stay as long as I need you?|只要我有需要，你就会留下来？

-Of course. -I swear I'm not an idiot.|-当然 -我发誓我不是白痴

I read books on pregnancy and giving birth.|我看了 怀孕跟生产的书

I didn't think to read about what to do when the baby comes.|我没有看 带孩子的书

And the baby's coming..|宝宝出生后…

and I don't know what to do. Oh, can I throw up in my Diaper Genie?|我不知道我该怎么办 我可以吐在尿布精灵里吗？

Sweetie, you're gonna be fine.|甜心，你你会没事的

-Where you going? -I'm going to the bathroom.|-你要去哪里？ -我得上洗手间

Now, don't worry. Everything's gonna be okay.|别担心 一切都会没事的

It is gonna be okay!|会没事的

Worth a shot.|这值得一试

Hey! Why are you all red and sweaty?|你干嘛满脸通红全身是汗？

I just Bamboozled Chandler!|我刚刚干掉了钱德

Which is not a sexual thing.|我没有对他不轨

-Well, that was a quick shower. -Not if you were here.|-欢迎会这么快就结束了 -因为你没来

Looks like we got a lot of good stuff.|看来我们收到不少好礼物

We did. My mom got us the greatest gift of all.|没错 我妈送给我们最棒的礼物

A Play-Doh Barbershop?|培乐多理发师工具组？

No. She's going to live with us for eight weeks.|不，她要搬过来 跟我们住八星期

What?|什么？

Yes! She's gonna help us take care of the baby!|对 她要帮我们照顾宝宝

You're not serious!|你不是认真的

She's a very nice woman, but we can't take eight weeks of her.|她是个好人 但我们无法忍受她八个星期

-She'll drive us crazy.. -Hi, Ross!|-她会把我们逼疯… -嗨，罗斯

Hey, roomie!|嘿，室友

Hey, I'm Ray. I'm the producer of the show.|乔伊，我是雷 本节目的制作人

It's a pleasure to meet you, Ray.|很荣幸能见到你，雷

This is Duncan and Erin. They're gonna help with the audition.|他们是唐肯跟艾玲 他们会帮你试镜

-Right, Ray. -Whenever you're ready.|-对，雷 -你准备好了就开始

Hello. I'm Joey Tribbiani. Let's play Bamboozled!|哈啰，我是乔伊崔比亚尼 我们来玩晕头转向吧

Erin, first question. In hockey, who is known as "The Great One"?|艾玲，第一个问题，在曲棍球史上 谁被称为是“伟人”？

-Gretzky. -Correct!|-葛瑞斯基 -答对了

Want to pick a Wicked Wango Card or spin the Wheel?|你要挑魔法机会卡 或转轮子？

Didn't your agents give you the revised rules?|你的经纪人没有给你 改变过的游戏规则吗？

We've eliminated all that. No wheel. No cards.|我们把那些东西都删掉了 没有轮子或机会卡

Why?|为什么？

It was too complicated. People didn't follow it.|那太复杂了 观众没办法了解

Complicated?! Spin the Wheel to go up the Ladder of Chance..|复杂？ 转轮子上机会梯…

through the Rainbow Ring to the Golden Monkey.|穿越彩虹环 找金猴

You yank his tail, and you're in Paradise Pond!|拉它的尾巴 就能到天堂池

Yeah. All that's gone.|对，那些都删掉了

It's a simple question-and-answer game now.|现在这只是个 简单的问答游戏

Well, what's fun about that?|那有什么好玩的呢？

You expect me to host a boring game of people answering questions?|你要我主持 观众回答问题的无聊游戏？

Women in bikinis hold up the scores.|会有比基尼女郎拿得分板

Let's play Bamboozled!|我们来玩晕头转向吧

So I thought we'd put the changing station in the living room.|我想我们该把尿布台 放在客厅里

I thought I'd bring in my decorator because I feel like I'm at my best..|我想请我的设计师过来 因为我觉得我最擅长…

when surrounded by jewel tones.|把房子弄得珠光宝气

Sure, who doesn't?|当然，谁不是呢？

Oh, and all those dinosaur knickknacks you have..|你买的那些 恐龙小玩意…

they might be more at home in the garage.|它们或许比较适合 放在车库里

-Well, we don't have a garage. -Did I say garage? I meant garbage.|-我们没有车库 -我说车库吗？我是说垃圾桶

You know what? Maybe it's not absolutely vital that you live with us.|你知道吗？ 或许你不一定要跟我们住在一起

-Well, Rachel needs help with the baby. -I really do. I don't know anything.|-瑞秋需要人帮忙带孩子 -真的，我什么都不会

I'm sure that's not true.|我相信那不是真的

Oh, no? Do I know anything about babies?|是吗？ 我会带孩子吗？

-No. Not a thing. -It's frightening.|-不 -那真的很可怕

Even if she doesn't know anything, I do.|就算她不会 但是我会

And I'll be there to show her.|我会教她

That's exactly what Rachel's father told me.|瑞秋的爸爸 也是那么告诉我

Know what he said at the first 3 a.m. feeding?|你知道第一次半夜三点起来喂奶 他说什么吗？

"I'm tired. You take care of it."|“我累了，交给你吧”

Which I later said to him when he wanted to have sex.|后来他想跟我求欢时 我也是那么告诉他

Well, I'm not Rachel's dad.|我不是瑞秋的爸爸

And no offense, but he's an ass.|我没有恶意 但他是个混蛋

I do like you, Ross.|我真的喜欢你，罗斯

I have a son. His mother and I didn't live together.|我有个儿子 他妈妈跟我没有住在一起

When he was with me, I took care of him all the time, by myself.|他跟我一起住时 我都是自己照顾他

-That's true. You do have another child. -Yeah.|-没错，你还有一个孩子 -对

With another woman.|跟另一个女人生的

Have you no control, Ross?|你没有自制力吗？罗斯

That's a different issue.|那是另一个问题

The point is, when the baby comes, I will be there to feed her..|重点是宝宝出生后 我会帮忙喂她…

and bathe her and change her.|帮她洗澡换尿布

I want to do all those things.|我愿意照顾她

-You don't need me to live with you. -Yes!|-你们不需要我搬过去 -对

Yes. You're gonna be so missed.|对，我会想念你的

-You'll be a great father. -You'll be a wonderful grandma.|-你会是个好爸爸 -你会是个好外婆

Hello? I still don't know what the hell I'm doing!|哈啰 我还是不知道我该做什么

Every first-time mother feels that way.|新手妈妈 都会有那种感觉

You're gonna pick it up. Hey, you will. Look, when you first came to the city..|你可以慢慢学，你会的 当你刚到纽约来时…

you were a spoiled, helpless little girl who used Daddy's credit cards!|你是个被宠坏的无助小女孩 只会用爸爸的信用卡

I hope you're going somewhere with this.|我希望 你真的有话要告诉我

Look at you. You're this big executive.|看看你 你现在是个大主管

You are more capable than you give yourself credit for.|你很能干 证明了自己的能力

I have no doubt you're gonna be an incredible mother.|我相信 你会是个好妈妈

-Really? -I'm telling you.|-真的吗？ -没错

Thank you.|谢谢

All right. I'm gonna get going.|好吧，我得走了

No, sweetheart, stay put.|不，甜心，别送了

I'll let myself out. It's like I'm not here. Which I almost wasn't.|我自己出去，就当我没来过这里 我差点真的来不了

You're just so funny. You're so funny. What do I do?|你真的太幽默了 我做了什么？

Nothing. You have apologized to her, like, a million times.|没什么 你跟她道歉很多次

And she's been nothing but terrible to you.|她只是 无视你的道歉

You just threw her daughter a lovely, albeit slightly boring, shower.|你让她女儿办了 一个可爱无聊的欢迎会

-And she hasn't even thanked you for it. -You know what? You're right.|-她甚至没有谢谢你 -你知道吗？你说的对

If you wanna say anything, I'd tell her off.|如果你有话要说 快告诉她

Really?|真的吗？

Okay, I will.|好吧，我会的

Mrs. Green?|葛林太太

Mrs. Green?|葛林太太

It is rude to leave a party without saying goodbye to the host.|不跟主人道别 就离开派对是很无礼的

When someone apologizes to you, the decent thing to do is to accept it.|如果有人跟你道歉 你得接受

What I did wasn't on purpose.|我不是故意要那么做的

But what you're doing to me now is plain spiteful.|但你对我的态度 太可耻了

-Spiteful? -That's right.|-可耻？ -没错

It's time you took a good look in the mirror, young lady!|你该好好去照镜子 小姑娘

Old lady!|老太婆

Lady!|女士

Wrap it up. Wrap it up. Wrap it up.|别说了

So whenever you're ready to apologize to me, I will forgive you.|只要你准备好跟我道歉 我会原谅你

Good day.|再见

I can't feel my legs!|我的脚没有感觉

You were fantastic! I'm so proud of you.|你真的太棒了 我非常以你为荣

-Yeah? I'm proud of me too. -You should be.|-是吗？我也以自己为荣 -你应该的

-Could you get me something to drink? -You got it!|-你能帮我拿杯饮料吗？ -没问题

Mrs. Green? Okay, I'm really sorry! I apologize. If you..|葛林太太，我真的很抱歉 对不起，如果你…

Okay! I bit my tongue!|好吧，我咬到舌头了

But I'm still really sorry!|但我真的很抱歉

-Okay, I'm ready. -You sure?|-好吧，我准备好了 -你确定？

I've done my studying, and I know my stuff.|我看过书 把一切都弄清楚了

All right, then.|好吧

Rachel Green, let's play Bamboozled!|瑞秋葛林 我们来玩晕头转向

How do you test the temperature of the baby's bath water?|你该如何测试 宝宝洗澡水的温度？

-Put your elbow in it. -Excellent!|-用手肘去试 -非常好

-How do you put a baby down for a nap? -Full, dry, on its back, no loose covers.|-如何让宝宝小睡一下？ -喂饱她，换干尿布，趴睡，被子盖紧

Correct!|答对了

There's a hopping bonus here, but I don't suggest you take it.|这题有跳跃加分 我不建议你那么做

Okay.|好吧

This is an audio question. What do you do when a baby makes this sound:|这题是声音题 宝宝发出这种声音时你该怎么办？

Check if it's wet or hungry, burp it.|检查她是尿湿或饿了，帮她拍背

Excellent! Now do you want another question or a Wicked Wango Card?|太棒了，你要再回答一题 或抽魔法机会牌？

-A card! A card! I pick a card! -Oh, I'm sorry.|-我要抽牌 -对不起

You've been Bamboozled! You're gonna be a terrible mother!|你出局了 你会是个烂妈妈

I've lost sight of why we're doing this!|我忘记我们为什么要这么做了

Please don't walk away.|请不要走开

I've gone too far.|我说得太过火了